Two Things to Try Today to Support Executive Functioning in Kids
- Lindsay McMurphy
- Aug 2
- 2 min read
Updated: Aug 3
Building executive functioning skills doesn’t have to be overwhelming! Here are two quick and high-impact strategies you can try today.
1. Ask, “How Did You Do That?”
Encourage self-reflection by asking your child this question whenever they complete a task—even by accident! This helps them recognize what worked and builds awareness of their own thinking process.
Example: Your child finishes a puzzle. Instead of saying, “Great job!”, ask, “How did you figure that out?” This invites them to reflect on their strategy, reinforcing problem-solving skills.
2. Switch to Declarative Language
Instead of giving direct instructions (“Put on your coat.”), try phrasing things as observations or gentle prompts (“It’s chilly outside. I wonder what we need to stay warm.”).
This shift reduces power struggles, supports independence, and encourages kids to think for themselves!
Example Transformations:
❌ “Do your homework.” → ✅ “I see your homework on the table. What’s next?”
❌ “Get in the car.” → ✅ “Everyone else is in the car. We’re almost ready!”
Shifting Language to Support Executive Functioning
Imperative Language (Commands) ❌ | Declarative Language (Encourages Thinking) ✅ |
"Put on your coat." 🧥 | "It’s chilly outside. I wonder what we need to stay warm." 🌬 |
"You need to do your homework right now." | "I see your homework on the table. What’s next?" 👀 |
"Get in the car!" 🚗 | "I see everyone else is in the car. We’re almost ready!" 🚦 |
"Clean up your toys." 🧸 | "Hmm, I wonder where this toy belongs." 🤔 |
"Stop running!" 🚶♂️ | "Walking feet help keep everyone safe inside." 🏡 |
These small changes help support executive functioning by encouraging kids to think for themselves instead of relying on adults to do all the thinking.
Want more tips? Download our free Executive Functioning for Parents Guide here for more tools to support your child’s growth!
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